pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
