i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
