I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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