Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
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Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
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not ubering you a puppy
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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