im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
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