I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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