He asked to "fluff my boner.."
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
