Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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