I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
