we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
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