So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
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