Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
