oh god the rape fog is back!
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
