I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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