She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
