I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
My feet surprised me
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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