fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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