am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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