What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
