If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
