they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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