Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
COCAINE IS GR8
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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