She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
