I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
