It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
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She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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