U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
