I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
