turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
