Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize