Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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