Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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