The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize