puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
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We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
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My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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