I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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