Don't you send me to vm
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
