i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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