It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize