We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
