The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Actions speak louder than pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize