a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
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