I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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