SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
