Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
