i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize