This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
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