problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
So many bounce houses so little time
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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