You're completely useless in the revolution.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
