Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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