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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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