I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize