Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
