So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
